September 27, 2014- Auto Pilot
I wake up. I pray. I shower. Brush my teeth. Put on my clothes. Go to work. Lunch. Get off work. Call my sister. Go home. Fix dinner. Eat. Facebook. Pray. Go to sleep. Wake Up. and it is the same routine all over again the next day. The monotony has now become so repetitive that it is almost peaceful. Funny, I shared time with two very important women in my life this week and each of them…shared this same revelation. When asked how are you doing, we each answered: "Fine" or "Living day by day" or "Blessed" or "I am doing alright". And then when I go to further explain myself…the only thing that came to my mind was AUTO PILOT. I feel as though I am on auto pilot and they both agreed. I feel like something big is on the rise, you know? And this state of "content" is not necessarily a bad thing.
And that is the point of this blog. Sometimes as an Artist or as a person, we feel like we can do more and go after more. When in reality, we are in this state of rest and content because we are being setup for something greater. This is the first time in the past 8 years or so I am just worried about Brit. Not "if I am making someone else happy" or "if I have all of the answers" or whatever. The simplicity of just waking up and being all about myself is so fucking refreshing. And that is how it should be. While you have the time to be alone---enjoy it. And be happy with what you have now… and yes DREAM about what more you are going to have. As I was driving home this evening, I realized that i am not happy with where I am with my life right now. I wish I was full fledge acting out in LA or up in NY performing 3 to 4 times a day and have the auditions pouring in. Sounds so ideal but the thing is…it is not my time right now. And every step I am taking now will push me towards it because my priorities are FINALLY getting in order.
I am allowing for my steps to ordered and that is not an easy task for a "go-getter" spirit like myself but I have found so much resonance in being by myself. The pattern of the past few months have been a great tool. Remember to live…not just exist.
So take thee away Capt…I am readying myself for the flight.